Curry beans

1. open tin of beans
2  put bean in pot and turn on heat
3 add table spoon of curry powder
4 cook for another few minutes
5 eat yum yum

Greg Wallace

I was sitting knocking back a few cans of special brew the other night trying to find something decent to watch on the telly. By chance I happen to flick on to beeb 2 which was showing a program called the Great British Food Revival the first part of the show was hosted by none other than Greg Wallace of a masterchef.


Greg was harping on about how no one eats spuds any more instead we all eat foreign muck like rice and pasta instead, so to sort us all out and spot us eating the foreign foods he was gonna show us how to cook a few potato recipes. 


What do you think Greg's first choice of Spud recipe was?


Gnocchi! 


Now i could be wrong, Ok sure its made wa spuds but the last time checked gnocchi was fuckin Italian.


Greg Wallace is a spud faced twat.

St Patricks Day food

Its St Pats tomorrow a great excuse for a party, like we ever needed one!

A fair old amount of cheap nasty eyeball and asshole filled reclaimed meat burgers that will be munched tomorrow at various community events. Or for those of us willing to brave the the crowds on the bus in ta town and watch the tacky parade that fuck all to do with good old St Pat (Its about the enviroment this year) sure there are loads of places to chow down. Thinkin about it if you when to McHughs you could chow down while watching Stacy Soloman and some twat called lemar. ( i think he is some kind of ring tailed monkey).

Lemar or Lamar Or what ever

I myself will be saving myself for the now traditional riots in the Holy Lands when all the culchie kids who cant control themselfs  after 2 pints. 

I will be taking a packed lunch of 1 Case of  beer (proberly steiger), a few hard boil eggs (can alway chuck em at the peelers if i get bored).

Traditional St pats bbq in holylands

Cant wait.

Sundae Roast

Dinner and desert in one bowl, finally someone's done it yum!

Watching you

Quick Chilli

When the weathers shitty outside like it is at the moment ya need something hot inside ya ta keep ya going.
Nothing heats you up like a good chilli but they take  time to make and i couldn't be bothered waiting so this quick recipe will have ta do.


What you will need ta buy


1 lb mince
a red or green pepper
couple of jalapeños
1 medium onion
2 tins of plum tomatoes
2 tins of kidney beans
salt and pepper
3 to 8 tbsp of chili powder (depending if your a wuss or nat)
1 or 2 cups of water
1 bog roll (keep in fridge until needed)




How ta make it (after ya wash yer dirty feckin hands)




1 Start by chopping up the onion, bell pepper. and jalapeños


2 Fry the mince in a large pot on high heat. Chuck in the red/green pepper and onion in to soften up  a wee bit while the meat is cooking.


3 Season the meat while it is frying with salt and pepper.


4 Once the ground beef for your quick chili is thoroughly cooked, drain off the fat.


5 Put the pot back on high heat, fire in the rest of your ingredients and let boil for 5 to 10 minutes, stirring it so that it wont stick.


6 Turn the heat down to medium on your cooktop. Stir every 5 to 10 minutes and allow to cook for at least 20 minutes. (longer if ya can)


7 Serve on rice,chips,wraps, nachos or whatever.


Eat and enjoy
Ps Dont forget to go to the fridge next time your heading to the crapper

A mans meal.

After a days work a man needs a real meal.

Micky D's second best at best

The great golden arse in the sky might be famous around the globe, but another fast food outlet has passed Micky D’s as the world's largest restaurant chain. 


Subway is the new leader with about a 1000 more shops around the world, than McDonald’s, at least according to Subway.


The US-based chain of over priced sarnies has shoved a shop on just about every frickin corner in last few years.
  
McDonald's has responded with the usual old shit about it is growing' but is committed to being better and not just bigger.


Anyone who eats there will know this is balls (they only do one burger worth eating)


McDonald's rep claimed that their revenue was £14.85bn (US$24bn) last year compared to £9.2bn (US$15.2bn) for Subway, so Subway could go swivel.

Pancakes for dumbies!

Alright its pancake Tuesday the only day of the year with a foodstuff in it.

So i had better tell ye how ta make some.  

Ingredients

250g plain flour

1 egg

2 x teaspoons baking powder (the wee spoon you use to eat boiled eggs) 

250ml milk

pinch salt

water

Equipment

Mixing Bowl

Electric Blender

Ladle

Frying Pan

A Cooker

Pot

Making your Proper Pancakes

Wash your fuckin grubby hands before preparing food. 

Alright try not to balls this bit up its not that friggin hard, even so i have numbered the steps so you don't get confused!

1. Add the milk, flour,salt and baking powder to the bowl

2. Blend using an electric blender as whisks are for losers

3. Make a smooth batter

4. Heat a little oil in a large frying pan

5. Using the Ladle add the batter

6. Cook until brown on each side not black, turning them with a fish slice not chucking em round the room.

 (black maybe how yer ma made um but its still wrong)

7. Put them on a plate or you will burn your hand 

8. Simmer water in pot

9. Put nutella jar in water until contents go runny

10.Pour on the Nutella

 Scoff em quick before the sprogs see em.

What's it about?

This blog is mostly about food and one fat mans ambition to eat it all.


Unlike other blogs i wont be just reviewing up market restaurants and hotels that serve fancy food.
Instead i want to talk about proper food that will put hair on your chest, fill your belly and give you that warm full -up feeling. 


In other words you can shove your foie gras up your arse I'd rather have a Pastie.